New Year's Resolutions

The Democratic Party is run, theoretically at least, by average everyday American citizens. And the average every day United Statian (the correct term) makes resolutions for him or herself as the New Year rolls around - generally, these are public promises to oneself that will in some way cause improvement in this person's lifestyle or fitness level, or simply their betterment as a human being.

So, if the Party is run by John Q. Public, shouldn't the Party make its own resolutions?

Of course it should.

These are the resolutions that, in my not-so-humble opinion, the Democratic Party ought to make this year:

This year, the Democratic Party resolves:

1. to dress better. This means figuring out a stand on issues that real United States voters care about and making that position known to the public before the Republicans find a way to marginalize the party.


2. to lose weight. It's time for us to find some new leadership - maybe some leadership that knows how to do more than just work the Party out of debt. Last I checked, the Party won its biggest elections when it spent more money than it had. Since we've gianed solvency, we've only lost seats in every major category.


3. to keep in touch with old friends. There are many parties and NGOs out there with much better connections and better grassroots efforts than the Democratic Party. Perhaps its time we gave those folks a call and chatted for a little while.

I realize how general all of this sounds, but you can't work out specifics until you have a goal in the first place.

Time to get to work, me hearties.